Tuesday, June 16, 2009

My Story..

Tuesday, June 16, 2009 0
This is the whole story.. The truth that you dont want to listen and know.. What did i told u before is true.. I already told you about this.. I will tell you once again.. I am not shame with this because i really do love you so much.. I not shame if others read this too.. What the best way is ask me.. Read this once again dear..

I been with this girl for 3 years.. Almost 4 years before i and her broke up.. She the one who want to break up with me.. She told me that she got pregnant with someone else.. she doesn't love me anymore and she love someone else. I'm very shock and very upset. At that time, i in kuching and she in miri. For the past 3 years, i been loyalty with her. You know how it feels, rite. Well, you know the rest of my story. Then i wrote a letter to her but i never print it out and sent to her. Slowly i get over with it. I throw away all the stuff that she gave to me including her pic. I never keep it. The letter that u read is already a past. Something that i already let it go. All what written in that letter is just a emosional sadness. For your info, ever since that day she call me to break up. I never msg or call her. It take time for me to recover from that pain. Slowly it heals. After that, i'm afraid to be in love again. I'm not interested in relationship after that. Been a single guy 4,5 month after the broke up. Then, i meet you dear. You make me fall in love again. This time, i'm not make a mistake to falling in love with. I'm deeply falling in love with you. I'm accept who you are. I'm being me, who love you more than everyone else and more than my own life. I'm not blaming you for the all misunderstanding between us. It because of me. My own fault. I keep telling you that it was my fault. I'm so sorry dear. It's my own stupidity because wrote that letter. I'm not afraid being honest with you. I don't have any secret or hide something from you. I told everything what i know to you. All i did because ii really do love you so much and i want you to know how deep my love towards you. You are so precious and special to me. I hope what i'm wrote in here will make you trust and never doubt my love towards you. I'm not shame let others read and know what in my mind and my heart and how i feel towards you. If i could, i let the whole world know how much i love you and my heart, my life, my love belong to you. I'm so sorry dear. Please forgive me. I always think of you and love you so much. Missing you so badly. :((

I'm so sad.. I'm so sorry..

Last nite, once again i make her cry again.. I'm such a bad bf.. i feel so bad toward her.. if i could, i want her to be happy always.. I'm being honest all the time with her.. I'm listening what ever she says.. knowing and seeing her crying, was the worst ever feeling i ever had.. i can't sleep and keep thinking about her.. i know how hurt her heart is.. if i have a special gifted, i wanna heal her pain and heart.. chase away all the sadness deep inside her heart.. while i wrote this, i'm so sad.. how i want to gain her trust towards me.. how to convince her that i really do love her so much.. if i could, i sacrifice my life for her happiness.. i never run away from her.. i trust her so much.. i know how deep her love towards me.. i dedicated all my life for her.. I'm willing do anything to make her happy.. all the pain, i will keep it and never let u keep it.. if she know how deep my love towards her.. if i could, i lend her my heart and let her use my heart for one day.. she will know how much i love her and how much i missing her every minute of my life.. i appreciate every minute i spend with her.. i really don't know what to do.. wish i could talk to her rite now.. i really do love u so much.. so sad enough.. we both in love.. i wish i always be there beside you..


This Song For You Dear..

I will be - Leona Lewis

There's nothing I could say to you
Nothing I could ever do to make you see
What you mean to me

All the pain, the tears I cried
Still you never said goodbye and now I know
How far you'd go

[Bridge:]
I know I let you down
But it's not like that now
This time I'll never let you go

[Chorus:]
I will be, all that you want
And get myself together
Cause you keep me from falling apart

All my life, I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day
And make everything okay

[Verse 2:]
I thought that I had everything
I didn't know what life could bring
But now I see, honestly

You're the one thing I got right
The only one I let inside
Now I can breathe, cause you're here with me

[Bridge:]
And if I let you down
I'll turn it all around
Cause I would never let you go

[Chorus:]
I will be, all that you want
And get myself together
Cause you keep me from falling apart

All my life, I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day
And make everything okay

[Ending bridge:]
Cause without you I cant sleep
I'm not gonna ever, ever let you leave
You're all I've got, you're all I want
Yeah

And without you I don't know what I'd do
I can never, ever live a day without you
Here with me, do you see,
You're all I need

[Chorus:]
And I will be, all that you want
And get myself together
Cause you keep me from falling apart

All my life (my life), I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day
And make everything okay

[Chorus:]
I will be (I'll be), all that you want
And get myself together
Cause you keep me from falling apart

And all my life, you know I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day
And make everything okay